hope and doing

last night, kat and i watched "born into brothels," an excellent documentary on the women and children of the red light district of calcutta (really, you should see it right away). i was struck by a comment one of the young girls made, her voice projected over an image of her cleaning pots with muddy water while her mother lipsticked and dressed herself in preparation for an evening of prostitution. life, she says, is sad and painful and it's best to learn to accept that.

i feel like the world is caught in a flurry of emotion. life is sad and painful. it's also beautiful and sweet. there is so much rottenness in the world, so much corruption, so much greed, so many hungry bellies, so many deceptions, so many unfulfilled needs. and there is so much hope, so much future, so much joy, so many committed to loving, so many committed to serving, so many committed to each other.

all these emotions were stirring inside me when i read through a few blogs this morning:

allan is thinking of africa, of his role (moreover, the church's role) there, and of his love of hurting people and a forgotten continent.

cory is thinking about truth and unity.

jenn is discussing God's justice and man's justice.

jennie is engaged (and congratulations again!).

jon just celebrated his 28th birthday.

laura recently reunited with a long time friend from china.

all of this looks like worship to me. can't you just feel god's heart celebrating with these people?

i mean, that's a lot to feel. i wish i could invite all these people into a room and we could talk about justice and love and mercy and strategy and vision-making and birthdays and relationships. and then we could unite together and LOVE people.

perhaps i am feeling particularly optimistic this morning. perhaps i've too simplified this. i don't care. because i am ready to be more hands on with my god. so here's what i'm gonna do:

1. i'm gonna watch my finances a heck of a lot more carefully. honestly, i do so love living in excess, but if i really aim to understand what it means to be living in light of eternity, then i want to stop trying to fulfill every freaking immediate right-now want i have.

2. i'm gonna aim to actually go to a developing nation. i just want to see what i'm not seeing. my american mind needs to be confronted with reality.

3. and i'm gonna continue to pray that i'll be a risk-taker. in fact, i'm gonna really commit myself to praying in general.

i like the way c.s. lewis writes, "what saves a man is to take a step. then another step."

honestly, my friends have made my heart so encouraged, so awake, as to make me run faster towards heaven, wishing to feel and serve and love alongside them. i think, by god's grace, we are capable of loving so much more than we know.

i cannot wait to see what the next 60 years of our lives will produce. really, i honestly cannot wait.