So you two are moving into a house with a swingset?

After leaving Que Syrah tonight with a spontaneous purchase of a beautiful bottle of Pinot Gris and a guarantee of perfection from the sales assistant, I walked home clutching the neck of the bottle and moaning on the inside, regretting every sip of my Potbelly's oreo milkshake I had sucked down at dinner only a few minutes earlier (damn this lactose intolerance). My distended belly groaned loud enough for passers-by to take notice, so I kept my eyes down and lowered my left hand towards my stomach to pat it as though "my baby" needed to be calmed. I figured I might as well pretend my stomach is SUPPOSED to look this ...

The streetlight cast my large-belly shadow on the side of the house and I took in a long look. I've often pretended I'm pregnancy just for giggles. My own giggles. I don't think anyone else thinks it's funny. But tonight, looking at my silhouette on the street, I thought seriously about how much having a kid would completely change my life.

At dinner tonight, my 29-year-old friend L and I talked about her upcoming move to the suburbs of Milwaukee. She's lived in Chicago for almost 5 years, and has only been married for a little over a year. She and her husband are happy, and the upcoming move will be good for them both. Their new house is many times the size of their city condo, backs up to some sort of arboretum, and even has a swingset in the backyard.

Not surprisingly, both L's and C's parents have asked them about children.

L is beautiful, young, crazy-talented, ambitious, and well-recognized for her business savvy. Though she's moving, she'll keep her job in the city and travel back and forth once a week or so. She's excited about the new house, but leaving the city is no easy task. And when both sets of parents add on the "when do you think you'll use that playset out back" question, L sighs.

I know she wants kids. And there's really no "but" to add in here. I just think, wow. My friend L can meet me on 30 minutes to notice at any nearby restaurant of choice. Because the city is sweet that way. And my friend L doesn't have to find a sitter because she doesn't have any kids. My friend L has nearly every freedom at her whim. Having children is a BIG deal.

I hope she has children when SHE wants children. I hope that for every woman. What a big big deal to put your body through something like that and then accept responsibility for a whole full life. Seriously, I'll raise my glass of Pinot Gris right now to every pregnant woman and mother. You amaze me.

And seriously, I think if you're single and you know someone with kids, you should call them and offer to watch their kids for free this weekend. That would be awesome.